Growing

Andrew took this picture of me and Noah on May 29th.

My boy is growing and I so want time to slow down! I know I can't keep him small forever but I'd be okay if he stayed small longer! I am definitely having issues knowing that this is more than likely our last child. With the other two I'd try to get them to nap in their cribs, get stressed if they didn't sleep at night, and easily lose patience with the older ones if they took away time from the baby. Not this time. I am spending as much time with my precious baby as I can. I don't mind getting up multiple times at night because I get to see him.

I'm also making sure to be purposeful with my older two babies as well - what precious girls they are! I really thought I'd be terribly stressed with three but I feel so easy going and relaxed (not two words I would have EVER used to describe myself) that it's crazy.

Well, all kids are napping and I have clothes to fold so this post will be short but I just want to say that I'm definitely experiencing some baby bliss. My kids bring me such joy (and yes, stress too, of course) so I want time to slow down so I can enjoy their littleness!

Recovery

My recovery from giving birth seems to be going great. I have always claimed that it really takes 6 weeks for me to feel "normal" and in some aspects I'm still not quite there yet (sleep!! hello!!) but I'm very pleased with where I am.

I don't feel like I'm incapable of taking care of all three kids during the days and today I got quite a bit of cleaning and other housework done.

I credit a lot of my recovery to my husband to MADE me rest the first week after Noah was born and he (my husband) was home taking care of things. Then he encouraged me to rest a lot the second week when my family was here helping me (thanks family!!).

Sleep could be much better, though. For some reason, I like to torture myself by writing down the nights events in a little note pad beside my bed. It's because people will ask me how the night went (like my darling husband) and honestly I can be so sleep deprived that I can't remember! I've done this with each child so it's nice to look back and compare. :)

Here is Noah's schedule from last night:

9:30 pm Noah in bed
11:00 pm - Changed dirty diaper and nursed
11:30 pm - Up again - nursed
1:15 am - Changed dirty diaper and nursed
3:15 am - Nursed
4:30 am - Nursed
6:30 am - Nursed and decided to get up for the day before the girls woke up. (Probably why I was so productive today).

Whew - I'm tired.

To compound these frequenty wakings, I also could NOT fall asleep. I don't think I was asleep, or at least not for very long, until after his 1:15 am feeding. I've never had insomnia while a newborn was in my care. I've ALWAYS been able to sleep. Weird.

He's had a handful of good nights where I will only get up with him 3 times (2hrs 45 min is about the longest stretch yet). He is a good baby in that he will go back to sleep after I feed him, for a little while at least and he is great about sleeping in his crib. The girls both used a bouncy seat or swing for the first few weeks or months. He did sleep in the swing a bit last night but it was only for an hour so it didn't help him to sleep longer.

Okay, that's all for now. Hopefully I can report soon that he's stretched out to 3 or 4 hours of sleep. That would be great!

Finally Fixed!

My computer is finally fixed! Yeah! Thanks to my IT guy!! :)

We finally took some photos of the kids on Sunday. Abigail had a runny nose and Noah hadn't slept very well (at all) the night before so we all stayed home.

Here is one of the best ones!! Elsie had just scraped her knee that morning. Poor girl!


Noah Blake - taken with Andrew's phone! I think he looks so "boyish" but it I'm not sure how he'd look in pink! :)

And . . . I finally got a picture of some of the features of the birth center this time. This is the very tub where Noah was born and where I spent the intense part of my labor (where I thought I might die - ha ha!). I literally could picture the word - epidural - in my mind but I wouldn't allow my tongue to ask for it and I'm glad for that now.

I'll try to post more details of the birth and following days later but it's nap time. I have lots of thank you notes to write, a hungry baby, and a desperate need for a bath or shower! :) Ha!

Not my fault!

So the lack of blogging is not my fault!

My first hurtle is my computer. It really can crash at any moment. If it does, this won't be posted. The video card went bad around the time Noah was born. I cannot look at videos and pictures make it extra touchy. I promise I'll be back with both once this thing gets fixed.

My second hurtle is the fact I have 3 kids under 3. Monday was my first day home alone with them. It went fine, really. Eveyone is well cared for and alive but it's just hard. Wow! When Noah naps well, things go much better with the girls. Elsie has become very clingy on top of everything else and . . . I can't find my sling (would help an incredible amount!). I have learned in the last few days that my response to things can make or break a situation. If there is crying (which is most of the day) I just can't let it make me frustrated or everything spirals down!

Noah is still sleeping in 2 to 3 hour blocks (3 hours is a luxury that he usually doesn't quite make) so I'm pretty tired. I am actually considering letting Andrew give him a bottle (of breastmilk - of course) this weekend so maybe I can hit a deep sleep.

Speaking of Andrew . . .

Today is our 8 year anniversary!! I am really looking forward to having fondue (fundue as we call it) tonight. I love him so much and he has been the greatest support in the history of the WORLD these last three weeks. :)

Welcome Noah Blake!

I cannot believe he's been here a week and I haven't posted yet. I'm a bad blogger!

Noah Blake was born on May 10, 2011 at 10:59 am. He was born in a drug-free waterbirth at our wonderful birth center. I can't imagine ever having a child another way at this point.

He was 8 lbs 6 oz and 21.5 inches long.

He is doing wonderful and despite a few slight adjustment issues from the girls, we're all wonderful.

He's not the best sleeper. Last night was better with a few 2 hours stretches. The thing that helps the most is if he just goes back to sleep after waking up for a feeding. I'm hoping that this week brings about big changes in the sleeping department. One thing though, he's doing great sleeping by himself in his crib - which neither of the girls did well at first, so I think that's promising. He does sleep best next to mama! However Mama does not sleep best next to him so I try not to bring him into bed until the morning hours.

Our household is interesting now. Let me just say this, if you don't like the sound of babies crying, don't come around here. I've had several instances where all three were going at it. Three years ago my nerves would have been extremely frazzled by this but now . . . it's just how life is! We'll see if I'm this calm and steady in a few weeks.

I will post more about my thoughts, feelings, and hopefully a full-blown birth story before too long but for now I'm just soaking up a lot of newborn snuggles. I'm not really caring if he sleeps too much during the day or if I hold him too much. He may well be our last baby (sad!!) and I want to enjoy every precious moment!

Been There

I'm up again with contractions. This time they are a bit more regular. I'm still not sure we'll be heading to the hospital any time soon but we'll see how things play out. They may stop all together (they have before) so I'm trying not to get my hopes up.

Andrew is awake this time too - so I hope they're the real thing!!!

Oh What A Night!

Last night was CRAZY! I went upstairs to take a bath at 9:30 pm. I got out about 10 pm and went to bed. Since I had taken a nap during the day I struggled to fall asleep. Finally (I think) around 11:30 pm, I fell asleep.

Had some very mild cramps (which I'd had off and on all day) during that time. Woke at 1:00 am to a contraction so I used the potty and came back to bed. I had them on and off (just fairly mild ones) until 2:30 am or so. I was hungry then so I got up to walk a little and have a snack.

They never got very close together but I didn't fall back asleep until 4:00 am because the cramps kept me up. Andrew woke me at 5:15 am (I had moved rooms) to see what was going on. He was leaving for work.

I told him I thought today would be a good day for him to stay home (ha!) but he decided to go anyway and just come home early since I hadn't had any contractions after my last round of sleep.

Boy . . . today is going to be fun! I'm just hoping to keep my kids fed and alive. Nap time is around1 pm and Andrew should be home towards the end of that. My sister is still here but she has to leave this morning so I'll have help for a little while anyway.

We'll see what the day holds.

Mother

First of all, I'd like to say "Happy Mother's Day" to my own wonderful mother. I never realized how much to appreciate my mother until I had my own children. I remember thinking during the middle of the night, when Abigail was a newborn, how much I owed to my mother. Wow! What sacrifice and love she gave to me all those years.

I'd also like to take the time to recognize the two little "joys" in my life that have given me the blessing of motherhood. Yes they are lots and lots of joy and laughter!

These pictures were taken last Sunday.

Elsie Joy and Mama

Abigail Jennifer and Mama

Baby brother is also rather obvious in these pictures. No he has not yet decided to join us on the outside world as of this morning (I'm writing this at 7:35 am). He is definitely his own little person and that's okay. We're ready to meet him whenever!!

Questions?!

Okay, here are some answers to some frequently asked questions in my life:

1) What did the doctor say?

Well, to be quite honest, I don't see a doctor. I (generally speaking) see midwives. They usually don't "say" much at my appointments. They check 4 things at this point. Weight, blood pressure, belly measurement, and fetal heartrate. If those are all good, they usually don't "say" much to me but will ask if I have any questions. If I don't . . .that's it. They will never guess on what day you will deliver and yes they have "checked" me recently but I'm reading more and more how that is no indication of when a baby will arrive. I've now been 2 cm for 2 weeks. See?!

2) Any changes?

At this point of pregnancy, I hardly know what is a "change" and what is just a minor discomfort that will pass. As I look back on previous pregnancies and birth, I can see some signs leading up to the birth that I should have recognized but I didn't. That will probably be the case this time. I kind of expected to "know" more this time around except I forgot . . . each pregnancy is different!

3) How are you feeling?

My main response to this question is . . . tired. Let me explain. I went to bed last night at 9:30 pm. I was very uncomfortable. I had a head pushing down and some feet pushing up under my ribs, esophagus burning heartburn and pain in my back. I didn't fall asleep until 10:30. I woke at 11:30 pm to go to the potty. I didn't fall back asleep until around 12:15 am because of heartburn and being uncomfortable. I woke at 1:30 am to my husband getting up to go to the bathroom. I was awake from 1:30 am until after 4 am. During that time, I heard some strange noises come over the monitor. I discovered that a toy (which is a BIG NO NO in my book) had been left in Elsie's crib and she was sitting up playing with it. I got up and went downstairs and took it out of the crib and laid her back down again. Then around 4 am, Abigail started to cry . . . no wail . . . in her bed. I got up to see what was wrong. She told me she was hungry. Usually I do not give in to stuff like this in the night but I was oh. so. tired. and she was oh. so. pitiful. so I got her a snack. Back to bed. I slept until 6 am when my husband left for work. I got up to use the potty. Slept until 7:10 am when I heard Elsie get up for the day. That doesn't happen every night but it is a good indication of why I'm tired.

4) Are you having contractions?

Well, yes and no. If you've ever given birth or had contractions you know that if you're having the real thing you'll be heading for the hospital so if you see me walking around, I've probably not had any real contractions. I generally call the other pains you might feel at this point, cramps. Yes, I'm having those but honestly, I've had them on and off since January so it is no indication of when the baby might come (which is what I know everyone wants to know).

5) Induction?

I can't believe I'm actually answering this yet since I haven't even hit my due date but as a general rule my practice does not induce unless medically necessary. That probably means a fetus in distress or VERY high blood pressure. They will do everything possible to no induce because that is a scary road leading to bad things (in my world). The midwife at my last appointment mentioned some "natural" things to try. I told her I wanted to wait for my due date to try them because I believe he'll come when he's ready.

Also a note about induction, I will have the midwives check the babies measurements before trying any sort of natural or other induction. This pregnancy was a wonderful surprise but that also means that I am not nearly as sure about the timing of this one than I was with the other two. Birth control was messing up the timing of my cycle so my due date as always been measured by the baby's size.

6) Surprised?

I'm surprised by how much I can still do at this point. I thought I'd be laid up on the couch but I have all the laundry done (currently), beds are made, lunch dishes are put in the dishwasher, all the dishes are washed, etc. I have a few things that I'd like to do today and tomorrow - including cleaning the fridge and kitchen cabinets - and you know what, I may just get them done. I am trying to just do as much as I can when I feel good because I don't feel good all the time.

Okay, that's it. Hopefully that explains things better than I can do face to face.

Oh . . . one last thing . . . silence from me (on the blog, Facebook, no calls from me, etc.) means exactly that. . . nothing is happening. Someone (me or Andrew) will post or let people know when the event is happening or soon after.

Ah, it's nap time so I'm off to rest a bit.

39 week appointment

I had my 39 week appointment this morning (despite not actually being 39 weeks until tomorrow). Andrew took these pictures yesterday.


Stats:

• Still dialated about the same amount. She said 2 cm and 80% so almost 3. Funny midwife.



• I didn't ask about my blood pressure but they didn't say anything so I'm sure it was fine.



• My belly measured 40 weeks - like last week - but it was a different person measuring so that probably makes a little difference.



• No real significant contractions or pains.



• She said the baby is not engaged yet but with 2, 3, 4 babies, a lot of times they don't drop until actual labor has started. I never noticed my babies dropping before until I was in the birth center getting ready to have them so that makes sense.


• She is concerned that the baby is laying posterior (meaning facing forward with his spine against mine) and not anterior like he is supposed to be. This primarily just means that I would have back labor so she gave me a few exercises to do to try to get him to turn around. I have read that most babies will turn during the labor so I'm hoping for that!!

I'm hoping the rain will hold off so we can go on a family walk tonight. Maybe that will help things!

It is still possible to have a birthday baby, I guess, but I assumed I would be feeling more contractions by now if that were the case. I guess we'll see.

And . . . I accidentally uploaded this picture instead of the one of me above but it is so cute I had to keep it. This was Abigail on Easter Sunday! :)

Baby Baby - Thoughts at almost 39 weeks

I really thought I'd have a baby by now. I guess the main reason I feel that way is that I thought my children would progressively come earlier and earlier but I guess that reasoning is faulty.

Abigail was 3 days before her due date, Elsie 6 days before her due date, so I guess I sort of assumed this one might be 9 days before his due date. No such luck.

Oh well.

Despite being increasingly uncomfortable (I NEVER remember it being this bad before) there is no rush for him to get here.

The hardest part is taking care of the girls all day. I can do it. I just can't think about everything that has to be done in a day for them or I feel overwhelmed. I'm so thankful for Andrew and all the help he's been giving me - especially with them.

I have done everything mentally possible to prepare. You see, my husband thinks that my babies are born when something mentally changes for me (like Abigail being born just hours after I left work on maternity leave). I tend to disagree with this argument. I think the baby comes when he's ready and then the hormones start labor. It has little to do with me! :)

Anyway, for my own memories sake, here is a list of things that I thought might release me "mentally" to start labor: getting all the laundry done last week, cleaning both bathrooms, cleaning the kitchen, cleaning the living room (dusting and vacuuming included!!), eating spicy mexican food (it's happened several times with no luck), having Andrew take pictures of me in late pregnancy (with Elsie I went into labor the day after we did this), stayed out "late" to play a board game with family (went into labor with Abigail the day after we did this) - didn't work since I'm not in labor right now), etc. That's all I can think of right now.

Well, I have a midwife appointment today so I'm sure I will report back on that. I'm not technically 39 weeks until Tuesday . . . which also happens to be my birthday. I'd love to share my birthday with our little boy but I had hoped he would come before then so I could actually enjoy eating something or resting in relative comfort on that day. Oh well. I know it won't be forever.

Smarty Pants

Abigail has been shocking us lately with her brain. Seriously. The girl is too smart for her own good. I wanted to write a few of these down so I don't forget.

She is 3 years and almost 3 months old.

• While eating dinner the other night, she wanted some of my food. I don't remember what it was for sure but I think it was corn. She said "Mama, can I have some of yours?" and before I even got a chance to reply to her request, she said, "God tells us in the Bible that we need to share." Oh my! I guess she's been listening to my constant speeches to her about sharing toys with her sister.


• While driving in the car a few weeks ago, she said something that her dad and I didn't understand. When I repeated what I thought she said, she replied, "No mom, I mean the thing you drink out of" which I guess meant she was talking about cups.


• While eating lunch the other day, I thought Abigail asked me "What is this?" and was indicating some peas I had placed on her plate. She looked at me funny when I said "a pea" and continued to repeat what she asked (which was) "Where is Dad?". When I said, "He's at work" she then replied to me "why did you say he taking a pee?" Ha ha ha ha!!!


• Abigail and her dad have occasionally been indulging in ice cream every so often in the evening hours. If we mention this ahead of time we never hear the end of it. One night Andrew had mentioned ice cream and Abigail had asked us many times over if it was time to eat it yet. Finally her daddy said that if she brought it up again that she wouldn't be allowed to have any. So a few minutes later she was jabbering to her dad about what fun things we were going to do that evening and she came to the part about the ice cream . . . in which she said "then we'll sit down together and umm. . . . well . . . umm. . . we'll have a yummy treat." Ha! We were both floored that she remembered his ultimatum and didn't actually mention the word "ice cream".

Royalty!

So, I'm sure we're all aware of the Royal Wedding going on today. I watched a bit of it and it was a nice distraction from the norm but I didn't get up early to watch or anything. So . . . in honor of the Royal Wedding today, I decided to post a picture that was taken by my very own husband . . . who was then boyfriend, of the Queen of England.

Yes, I'm not kidding. We just happened to be in Scotland while she was at the palace (I remembered being annoyed that we could not tour the palace because she was in residence!) and we just happened to be walking past the palace courtyard as she was getting into her car.

We were pretty much the only ones there, except for the guards doing their ceremony thing (just so she could get into the car - crazy!).

So, yes, I've been that close to the Queen. Enjoy the picture!!

She's the little blue dot by the car. :)




P.S. No baby yet. Nothing to indicate that he'll be coming anytime soon. Very very very minor cramping and that's it - could be ligaments even.

Baby Poll

I was reading back on my blog from when Elsie was born and loved hearing from all of you the stats of when you thought the baby would be born. So, I thought it would be fun to do it again.

Let me all know what you think about the following categories. Perhaps there will be a prize if you're the closest! :)

Birth Date and Time, Weight, Height, & Name

Here is my guess (obviously, I'm joking about the name, since I would be cheating if I posted the real one!):

May 4, 2011
1:10 pm
8 lbs 13 oz
21 inches long
Hector Schechter

38 weeks

I'm 38 weeks pregnant and finally posting a picture. Woo! I feel so organized. Okay, not really.

My midwife appointment went very well yesterday. Here are a few of the details.

• My belly measured at 40 weeks (yikes, no wonder I look like a whale!).



• I was 2 cm dialated.



• The baby had not "dropped" yet or engaged. The midwife said the baby did not float away when she pushed on him so he's out of room!



• My blood pressure was very good. 112/70. I'm so thankful that my last two pregnancies have been free of blood pressure problems.



• She also said the pressure (which I have felt for MONTHS) is normal for a 3rd pregnancy.

I'm still feeling pretty good. Some days are obviously better than others. I love spring but I don't love the allergy suffering that I get along with spring time. I had a terrible sinus headache yesterday (thankfully Andrew was home anyway - he stayed with the girls during my appt.) but I am feeling much better today.

I still can't help napping once a day (about) even though I really fight it and try not to. I sleep much better at night if I don't nap during the day but if I lay down and sometimes if I just sit in a comfy chair, I am asleep. My morning nap was only 30 minutes so hopefully that wont' affect my nighttime sleep much.

I was having some intense sternum pain for a while but I have found that if I sleep with a row of pillows in front of my, one for my leg and one for my arm, that alleviates the sternum pain. I guess I was sleeping with my shoulders hunched forward too much. I'm glad to have found a solution to that!!

I certainly am ready for this baby to come anytime but I am going to cherish these last few precious days a family of four - so he can come whenever he's ready (as long as it's reasonable!!). We actually made it to play group this morning so it was fun for the girls to get out and play with friends for a little while.

All for now!

Been awhile?

Sorry, it's been a while. I don't want to stop blogging (or slow down even) because I LOVE looking back and reading about our activities in the past . . . particularly around when the girls were born. It's just that I don't have much time to myself these days and when I do, I'm usually cleaning something or resting! :)

Anyway, here's a little update so I won't be upset with myself in the future for not writing this down . . .

- Andrew is in NYC today for several business meetings. He flew out this morning around 7 am (I think his flight was delayed an hour) and he'll be back around 11 pm tonight. I can fairly confidently say now that I don't think the baby will be born today but I will be able to greatly relax when he is safely home.

- I'm 38 weeks tomorrow (need to post a picture!) and looking back on this blog I can see that with my previous pregnancies I had had some decent contrations by this point and this time it seems like I have had nothing. I know that each pregnancy is different and that they could just start at any random time but I still feel like the birth is a ways away.

- In the past I have prepped myself for natural childbirth and labor by practicing relaxation techniques and by watching birth stories. I haven't done much of that yet but I'm not sure it will make much of a difference. We'll see.

- My kids are just joyful, wonderful, and extremely challenging and sometimes that wide range can happen in just a few moments time. I have really backed off committing myself to things this past week and while at times that in itself was challenging, by the weekend I was so thankful to have had that time to spend with my children and I don't regret it. I'm planning on keeping it that way for a while.

- Abigail can now write her own name, with no help from me, and several other words and names, such as Ron, Duck, Mama, Dad, and sometimes Elsie. I feel like I have to work every moment of every day with her on cheerfully sharing her toys. I have explained many times of the sin of selfishness and about how it is wrong to whine and mope around when mom and dad say "no" because that shows an ungrateful heart. Whew! I think it's still going to be a work in progress and the main thing I need is consistency!

- Elsie is just growing and learning by leaps and bounds in this last week. I worked with her for a week or two on the sounds different animals make and she is able to say some of them already. I am starting to tell that she is making sounds that are supposed to be words (All Done, Sissy, Mama, Light, etc) but she isn't understandable yet. Her newest obsession is the little Dora couch we have. She loves to get on there and sit for a while. It's so cute!! I love her age because you can see them learn something right before your eyes but I also find it most challenging too because the communication is so difficult!!

Well, that's all for now. I'm off to take my daily bath and read a bit before I need to pick up my kiddos from their Grandma.

Thursday Reflections on Children

As I was feeding Elsie breakfast this morning, I was thinking to myself that once children get to the same "stage" in life (for exmaple: the girls both feed themselves) it doesn't really matter if I just have just one child to feed or I have . . . let's say, six children to feed. The work load for me as a parent is just about the same.


This thought came to me because Abigail was still snoozing away while Elsie got up early.


I'm not saying that this will lead me to feel called to have more children but it was just an interesting observation that I made as I was cutting up strawberries and waffles this morning. It was almost as much work to get breakfast for one as it was to get breakfast for two (and so on and so forth).

Travels and Sacrifice

We learned this morning that my husband will need to return to NYC for another trip before this baby is born. Yikes. I will admit that this makes me nervous! Thankfully it looks like it will just be a day trip (you know . . . leave at 6 am and return at 11 pm) so I'm praying now that I will not go into labor on that day. I feel bad for the guy. He's just doing that he has too.


Speaking of that guy, my husband, I just want to say how very blessed I am. He has really been picking up the slack around here lately. He filled my car up with gas yesterday, which is no easy task with the gas tank not opening without some major propping of levers and prying of gas tank doors, etc.


He also makes other sacrifices that are not easy for him. He's a night person and yet he makes himself go to bed early just go he can get up early to go to work. This, in turn, allows him to be home at a decent hour in order to spend time with the kids (and, I'm assuming, me too). I admire self-control in others and he does an awesome job of showing his love to us by exhibiting self-control (getting up at 5 am!!!) to make his family time a priority.

Weekend and Test Results

We had a fun weekend with my sister and nephew visiting from Chicago. She helped me so much and it was such fun to play with my nephew. They are planning to come back for the birth of this baby as long as everything works out. I can't wait (for many reasons!). My mother-in-law also threw a wonderful baby shower for me on Saturday. I had so much fun seeing everyone and we got some very nice gifts for our baby boy. I need to start on the thank you notes now!! My OB practice just recently started using an online reporting system where you can see and schedule appointments, see test results, and submit questions to a nurse. I got a notification today that my test results were in so I went to look this morning. I'm THRILLED beyond what I can express that my Group B Strep test came back negative. I'm fairly certain this means that for this birth (for the first time ever!!!!) I do not have to have an IV with antibiotics. Yeah yeah yeah! That will be so much better for everyone. My iron levels also came back. They were in the normal range but on the very low side so they will probably tell me to keep taking the iron supplement for these next few weeks. I have managed to have a bit more energy and I've been more consistent with the supplement so I'm wondering if that is part of my problem from last week. I am still struggling with sleep every night. It is mainly just uncomfortability. I cannot sleep on my back (very heavy baby) and if I sleep on my sides then the hip I'm sleeping on begins to ache after an hour or two. I did take Tylenol PM (approved by my doc) a few nights ago and noticed I slept much better. Perhaps I'll have to resort to taking that every few nights to catch up on sleep. Last week Elsie had a runny nose for a few days (and major irritability! whew!) and now Abigail and I have picked up on the cold. It doesn't seem bad, thankfully, but adding a bit of a runny nose and sore throat to being 36 weeks pregnant isn't the most fun I've had in my life. I've also been getting up with Abigail at night since she's miserable with her nose and cough. I think she sounds just a tiny bit better today so that's good. I'm 36 weeks tomorrow and I can't believe how fast time is flying. One more week and I'll be full-term even though my babies have historically come between 39 and 40 weeks.

Memories

I always start to get very sentimental when I'm going to have a baby. The memories are so strong around these times because these are the moments that define life! I've been reading back through my blog to when Elsie was born and goodness, we had a rough time. I didn't really realize it at the time but just a lot of things hit us at once. Abigail was terribly sick three days after Elsie was born and then a week later I had a terrible breast infection. Whew! I remember my temperature going from 102 to like 96. When it would swing low I would wake up and be completely sweat soaked and have to change my shirt before nursing the baby. Not fun times! I'm hoping the recovery period for this one will be a little easier! I can't believe I'm posting this because I feel extremely huge but I'm doing it for my memories! This baby feels huge and I feel huge. My belly button is painful today and it's never popped out before but I'm wondering if this might be the pregnancy for that! I also want to thank my friend, Jen, for lending me her support belt! It has been helping to relieve some of the heaviness but the pressure pain is still there. I will be incredibly surprised if this boy is under 8 pounds. Another weird thing about this pregnancy that I've never experienced before is the need to always have my legs shaved. It's getting very inconvenient as you can imagine. I simply cannot sleep if my legs aren't very cleanly shaved! Ha! Also . . . see my little girl in the picture? She's teething! I'm pretty sure her eye teeth are coming in. She was awake for a bit last night but wasn't really crying so I didn't give her anything. She's been pretty fussy this morning but we made it to nap time and I know this too shall pass. We had a breakthrough with her communication today. I've really been working on getting her to sign with me and say some words and she very clearly signed "all done" after breakfast and it sounded like she spoke the words too. That is awesome! The more communication the better! I also had to tell her "no no" to eating the dog food (to which my oldest child responded "Mama, you hurt Elsie's feelings"! Ugh! So much explaining to do.) and after she'd received a little hand slap for trying to eat some after I had said "no no" she looked up at me and repeated "no no". Okay, girls are asleep and I've probably done too much already this morning so it's bath and rest time for me. Andrew gets home this afternoon (praise be!!!) and my sister is coming to visit tomorrow. I'm SOOO excited!

Abigail Update: 3 yrs and 2 months

Abigail is 3 years and 2 months old. What can I say about my first born?! So many things! She's becoming quite an artist (see her smily face in the photo above). Here is a picture of her "Skyping" with Grandma Roro!

• She is a wonderful helper . . . getting me diapers, wipes, putting away toys, checking on her sister, (and many other things) any time I ask.


• She generally has a wonderful attitude when I ask for her help. She will occasionally say "I'm busy right now"!


• She is a sensitive girl! I explained to her just yesterday that being short and snippy with me hurt my feelings and wasn't honoring to me as her mother. She immediately burst into tears and when I asked what was wrong she said "I hurt your feelings". I hope she keeps this sensitive spirit!!


• She has a fantastic memory. She will bring up events from weeks and even months ago when I think there is no way she will remember something!


• She is a genuine mother! The girl would mother a rock if I let her bring one in the house! She mothers stuffed bears, stuffed dogs, her sister, friends, me and her daddy, and any other toy or object that has had a hard day and needs some love! So funny!


• She is turning out to be a smart little thing. She can write almost all of her letters and continually asks me and her dad how to spell things so she can write them on her white board or magna-doodle. She loves writing people's names in particular.


• She tends to be a bit of a perfectionist! When writing people's names, if she can't get a letter exactly right she begins to get frustrated and will ask me to write it for her. I will be honest when I say that this isn't a trait she got from either of her parents! :)


• She is the silliest girl I know. She cracks her own jokes and then laughs hysterically!


• A good example of her silliness was yesterday while we were eating dinner with her Nana. Abigail said, "Mama has a baby (in her tummy) and Nana has a baby." I said, "Oh really, who is Nana's baby?" Abigail says, "Jesus". . . and then laughs hysterically.


• She loves to be read to and to "read" to other people.


• She wears size 4t or 5t clothes and size 9 or 10 shoes. She is a tall girl!


• She has been potty trained since August but has recently been having potty accidents several times a week.


• She still wears pull-ups at night. I started working on talking about staying dry at night a few weeks ago but when she began to have day time accidents, I backed off.

Trying on Mama's Glasses!

I could really fill this blog up each day with the girl's activities. I need to do a better job of writing down the funny things she says!

Updates: Elsie and Baby #3

I have had so much fun reading through old blog posts to see what Abigail was up to when she was Elsie's age . . . and so forth. I have really be slacking lately to keep it update for Elsie, so I am going to try to do better! Elsie is almost 17 months old (in about a week) and it feels like she's turning into such a little girl now and not just a baby!

• She loves to feed herself!


• She can drink out of a regular sippy cup now (she know how to tip it back) and does great at getting lots to drink each day. I usually have to go on a sippy cup hunt when she's carried it off somewhere!


• She is saying just a few words but she acts like she desperately wants to talk and babbles constantly.


• She can say, "Mama, Dada (in direct reference to us), and Uh Oh". I think she says "more, all done, Nana, and Roro" but those are more guesses than anything else.


• She is fascinated with lights and can make the "l" sound pretty clearly but the rest of the word doesn't really follow yet so I can't claim she says "light".


• She is a fantastic sleeper! She got up a few times at night about two months ago due to extreme teething but other than that, the girl sleeps from 7 to 7:30 pm until anywhere between 7:15 am and 8:30 am (usually in the 7 o'clock hour). She's been sleeping through the night since we started giving her cow's milk to drink back in December.


• She did great playing with other kids (and was actually slightly more social than her sis) when we had a playdate here last week. One of the other mom's had a newborn and Elsie was crazy about the baby. Of course, I had to watch her like a hawk because she just wanted to poke the little baby in the eye. Yikes! What am I in for?!


• She wears 12 to 18 month size clothes and still wears a teeny tiny size 3 shoe! I haven't weighed her in a while so I will try to do that soon.


• She gets along so well with Dewey - much better than her older sis. Andrew even said he came downstairs a while back to see Dewey sitting right in front of Elsie and Elsie was scratching/patting his back!! :) This is good because I think we're going to try to have them share a room.


• She still wears a size 3 diaper.


• She can clap her hands on command, give high 5's, and give kisses when we ask.


• She often will go into the other room, get a book and bring it to us. It's pretty obvious she wants to be read to! She will sit quite still through a book at least once and sometimes more.


• She's still a Mama's girl but lately has confidently been able to go to Daddy and Nana for comfort as well.

• This picture was taken a few weeks ago. Around 30 weeks, I think. Sorry about the mess. This was taken in my closet!! :)


• I am 34 weeks and 4 days pregnant.


• It's getting difficult to breathe at this point! :)


• I am getting up 2 to 5 or 6 times a night to pee or to eat!! I guess my body's just getting used to being awake at night.


• Sleeping at night is becoming more and more uncomfortable. My main complaint is that my hips and legs ache a lot. It helps to lay in the Bradley position and to shift a lot - which is hard to do as well.


• I am having a little heartburn but it doesn't seem to be as extreme as it was when I was pregnant with Elsie. Maybe he'll be a smaller baby.


• My favorite thing is to take a bath everyday. I am definitely most comfortable there!


• It's hard to bend over to help dress little kids and to pick up toys. I'm thankful that Abigail is such a helpful girl and it has also been extremely helpful to have the changing table on the first floor. Much easier to use that for my little pooper, Elsie, than to change her on the floor or couch.


• I have had Braxton Hicks/Cramping for 3 or 4 months now. Can be pretty uncomfortable at times but it is good to know they don't cause any progression.


• I am also having a lot of pressure pain, especially when I am on my feet to long. I try to schedule laying down breaks and that helps a lot. I had this at the end of my pregnancy with Elsie (after 37 weeks) but this time it started in week #23 or 24.


• I think we've narrowed the naming possibilities down to 2 or 3 names. We probably won't officially decide until we get the baby in our arms but it's good to be on the same page!

I think that's all for now. I'll try to update Abigail's doings another time!

When you think you know it all . . .

I just assumed that pregnancy #3 would be easy. In some ways it is a little easier but there are still unexpected events that I assumed would never happen! Sunday found me wondering if I was "progressing" some. I have been plagued by random and yet painful cramps and pressure since January. I decided to go ahead and move my appointment from Thursday to yesterday "just to check". Thankfully the midwife found no progress at all. This is a GOOOOOOD thing. You see, my darling husband is leaving next Sunday for several days for a business trip and I really don't want to have a baby or even feel like I'm having a baby without him here. I'm just astonished most days that I can't do more. I can only be up for about 15 to 30 minutes before the intense pressure starts (maybe he's a big baby!) and I have to lay down. I'm trying to be smart and to just scale back on doing "stuff" that isn't necessary. That is an incredibly difficult thing for me to do with my "achiever" personality. So I have decided for the next six weeks to just do what I feel like I can do and nothing more. So here is my pledge . . . I will not (for the next six to ten weeks) . . . - feel guilty if my kids watch a bit too much TV. - feel guilty if I don't get the laundry done or cleaning done the way I think it should be. - feel guilty if I don't provide fun "outings" and other forms of entertainment for my kids (after all, it's a great life skill for them to learn to entertain themselves). - feel guilty if I take a bath everyday. - feel guilty if everything is not perfectly ready for the baby to come (like washing all the old baby gear - I've started but I move slow!). And last but not least . . . the VERY VERY hardest of all . . . I WILL ask for help before things become an emergency! That is so hard for me! Anyway, I'm off to take my bath now, lay on my bed, and perhaps fold some laundry while laying on my bed. It's nap time, ya know!!

Snappy Confessions!

Thanks for reading my rant from yesterday and for your support. I got several things done this morning so I'm feeling better in that department but I'm still sick of myself in another way.

I have struggled (at least since have kids) with my short-temper. Thankfully Andrew does not have this problem but I just am not patient and especially when I'm uncomfortable. I hate the fact that the more pregnant I become, the shorter and snappier I get with my kids. I HATE it! Hate hate hate! The fact that I'm uncomfortable all the time and unable to physically do things is not their fault (it's their daddy's fault!! ha ha!). Anyway . . .

I'm trying hard to be patient and kind, I really am but the snapper in me is coming out way too often for my liking.

Even just now it happened.

To make a long story that is not worth telling, short, I will just say that before her nap I discovered Abigail had hid her pacifier's in the basement. I should have let her nap without them (and I did leave her with the impression she wasn't getting them) but she was screaming her head off and I covet the daily nap time so I can . . . umm shower, sit down, perhaps clean a bit. So I went and got them but not before I snapped at her.

Ugh! This bothers me so much more than what she did - that I cannot control my temper (I didn't yell - however - and was proud of that) and my response to an innocent situation.

Guess I simply cannot do it alone and need to pray for patience and kindness in these last days!!

Balance? Is it possible?

I've been struggling so much with balance lately. . . balance between resting and work. I spent one day a few weeks ago working my tail off. I made lots of food and cleaned a lot. Felt fine that day but the next day - whoa! Not good. I even called and moved up a midwife appointment because I thought I might be "progressing" some. I am not.

I've tried to take it easier since then but it's hard when discouragement sets in. Whenever that happens to me, all I want to do is to try harder in order to get things accomplished.

For example: I meant to have the kitchen clean today (it was on Monday!) but instead I spent the morning . . . accidentally dozing on the couch, cleaning up dog vomit (I have very very little love left for that dog since he's adding work to my life), refereeing kids, kissing wounded kids (Abigail started running when I was asleep and fell and hit her head - she's fine), finding out we had hardly no food in the house for lunch, ended up making spaghetti only to find out that Abigail wouldn't eat hardly any (she took a few mandatory bites), and the list could go on.

All of this is piled on the fact that I had a rough night with pretty painful yet not consistent contractions/cramps. I know they are Braxton Hicks but that still does not help the fact that I cannot sleep when I have them.

Beyond that, Andrew leaves for a 3-4 day business trip to New York the week after next. I feel a bit more at peace about this situation after talking through some "what-ifs" with a friend of mine this week.

In the midst of all of this life stuff that makes me so discouraged, I am constantly reminded of how blessed I am! I have so much to be thankful for that I could not even begin to list it all here. I am trying to soak in every moment of this pregnancy and feeling the baby move (is it really movement at this point or more like the kid is playing a soccer game inside) because it's probably going to be the last one!

I'm not even sure where I'm going with this. These are just thought that bounce around in my head constantly. Always the push and pull of needing to keep things straightened up (after all - that's my job) and needing to rest so I don't feel awful later that night or the next day.

I guess the main thing is that I need to stop being so short-sighted. After all, I'm probably only going to be pregnant another 6-8 weeks (hopefully not 8!!) and so I will have plenty of time to clean and cook after the baby comes!!

Pineapple + Elsie = Don't Mix!

My apologies . . . these pictures are in reverse order. I forgot to upload them the other way and frankly, my time is limited so they'll have to stay this way!!

On March 9th, we started out the day like we do any other day, with fresh fruit for breakfast. I had a fresh pineapple in the fridge, so I cut it up and gave both girls a pretty good sized portion.

We finished our breakfast and I noticed Elsie's mouth was a little red and irritated looking.

The more time passed, the more I realized she was having a pretty nasty reaction. We had also eaten Oatmeal for breakfast and I really didn't think the reaction would have come from that. I called the doctor to ask about a dosage size for Benadryl and then watched her carefully all day.

Here are some photos from that day.

After the Benedryl and before her nap. She's looking better.

Abigail did not care for all the attention that was given her sister and was feeling sad . . . so I took her picture. :)

Mama and Elsie snuggling in the morning.

Such a pitiful sight! Poor girl.

Not feeling good at all. Later she even ran a fever for a few hours. I guess it was the allergen just fighting against her immune system.

So . . . if you're babysitting my kids - no peanut butter or pineapple!!!

Again?

I know I still have 7 to 8 weeks left (approximately) but this is the time in pregnancy where I really ask myself the question: Can I really do this again? Give birth, I mean. If I think too hard about it, I scare myself. If I don't think about it at all then I'm not mentally prepared.



Fine line!



I know I'll be fine and my confidence comes from the fact that I know I have the best birth coach a person could ask for: Andrew. Seriously. I absolutely give him full credit that I could not have drug-free births without his support, confidence, and calmness!!



The countdown is on!



32 weeks today!

If I go missing . . .

If I don't blog for the next 2 months, refer back to this post (I'm sure that won't happen but . . . you never know).

When I was pregnant with Abigail I was uncomfortable in the final stages but I remember lounging in the tub at 7 pm most nights. Watching movies on the laptop in bed and having my husband pick up dinner on his way home from work. Yes I was working too but my job consisted of me sitting in a chair, working on the computer and answering a phone.

When I was pregnant with Elsie I was uncomfortable but Andrew worked closer to home and was home more and I don't remember Abigail being that demanding at her age. I was still working and a few times I even took advantage of the fact that Abigail was at daycare, went home early, and had Andrew pick her up (maybe it was only once). I remember it being taxing with a little one but since the majority of my day was again. . . sitting at a desk typing and answering phones, not such a big deal.

This time around . . . . I had no idea how hard it would be to be pregnant with two small children and be a stay-at-home mom with them! I am wiped out! I am so thankful for my family and I wouldn't trade them for anything but it's just interesting to note that I didn't really realize how good I had it before (especially in my first pregnancy). :) Physical stuff, like picking up toys from the floor, carrying laundry, mopping, cleaning the tub, etc, is pretty much impossible at this point and I still have 8 weeks to go! My best defense is just to pace myself. So . . .

I'm off now to clean and rest, cook and clean and rest. Rinse. Repeat!

Abigail's Prayer

Abigail prayed before bed tonight and this is what she said:

"Dear God, Thank you for Elsie, and Mama, and Dada (whispering to me: "Mama, who else?" I told her to just pray for whoever she was thinking of), and Nana, and Uncle Brett, and RoRo. Thank you for their love. Amen."

I thought that was really sweet and wanted to write it down so I could remember it. I'm thankful for such a sweet and tender little girl!!

Soaked Whole Wheat Bread Triumph!

I have been trying for weeks now to bake bread for my family in order to save money and to be just a bit healtheir by avoiding many of the preservatives found in store-bought bread. It's been a struggle! Part of my problem is that I feel like I shouldn't struggle in baking. I honestly feel like a very experienced baker (from my 4-H days and just being a wife and mom) and that I shouldn't have flops. But alas, that's not true. I have killed the yeast and not let bread rise long enough, etc.

I think I have finally conquered the bread baking today! Yeah! I am particularly excited about this recipe because of several reasons.

1. It is a soaked bread recipe. If you don't know anything about soaking grains, I would encourage you to read this article. www.thenourishinggourmet.com/2008/03/nourishing-practices-soaking-grains-2.html.

2. It uses mostly whole wheat and spelt with just a little white flour. I was making all white flour bread with poor results so I'm thrilled these turned out so well with the whole wheat.

I cannot take credit for the recipe, so if you want it, you'll have to visit the blog I got it from. www.musingsofahousewife.com/2010/01/homemade-whole-wheat-sandwich-bread.html

Here is a picture of my finished product today. They were baked in two different styles of pan (I'm trying to switch to all glass or ceramic baking pans and get away from using teflon coated) which is why they look different. Yum!

Abigail's verdit was . . . yum! We'll have to see what Andrew's opinion is after he arrives home from work today.

Sometimes my cravings pay off!

Tonight I had a craving for fish!

I had some frozen cod and so I decided I wanted a little sauce for it.

So . . .

I made baked cod with a lemon butter sauce - yummo!! I also served it with Leek and Carrot Brown Rice Pilaf. The rice was a little sticky but still tasted great!

Sorry . . . no picture because I was too busy eating (and feeding) the meal!

-------------------

I also have to mention that I am oh! so! thankful! because my oldest daughter has become such a good helper to me. The child has always enjoyed cleaning but lately if I start her off on something (picking up her room - which can be TRASHED in one day) she'll do it all by herself - perhaps with a little guidance of where things go. This has been saving my back lately and really helping to keep the toy population a bit under control. She also checks on her sister if I ask, gets me diapers (and throws them away), and lets the dog outside and inside. There are many times that my weary, pregnant body just does not want to move another step to do these tasks so they are very helpful! I hope she'll continue to be helpful as she grows but I know she will! I've been talking a lot about all the tasks that a new baby will need help with so I'm hoping that she'll enjoy helping and not get too jealous when the time comes.

The great Paci Dilemma!

I have a confession to make . . . my 3-year old (who just turned 3 - 2 weeks ago) still uses pacifiers to sleep for naps and at night. She MUST have one in her mouth and one in her hand for complete comfort.

I thought she'd be ready at 3-years-old to give it up but now I'm not sure. I live by the rule in parenting that I try not to mess with a good thing unless absolutely necessary. Abigail was 2 1/2 when she moved out of a crib, a little older when we started potty training, etc. And it has worked . . . marvelously!

I am home alone with the girls a few days ago. I put Abigail to bed (maybe I'll post another time about how she's fighting bedtime like crazy these days!) and then headed upstairs to read in bed myself. About 1/2 hour later I hear her start to wail in her room.

I gave her a few minutes but she did not calm down so I went to check it out.

Her answer when I opened the door to ask what was wrong . . . . . . . . . "I can't find my PACI! Waaaaa!!"

Oh my goodness!

She got a scolding from me about how crying over a paci is not appropriate and that she is a big girl and can get out of bed and find the paci without disturbing me.

I had no problems with her after that.

Now . . . on to nap time the next day. Upon closer examination of the four paci's in her room - I found minuscule holes in all of them. I'm not about to let my child suck on a pacifier that has a hole in it so I threw them away. Bring on the tears!

I know that I should have been strong and just said, "Well, I guess that's the end of the paci's honey" but I wanted her to nap so I broke down and gave her one of Elsie's newer paci's. Ugh! She, of course, still continued to cry because she didn't have a second paci.

So . . . any other moms have experience with giving up the pacifier? We're about to give her a twin sized bed instead of a toddler bed and she wants it so bad. I'm thinking that might be good leverage for her to try and give them up all together - that a big bed means she's a big girl who doesn't use pacifiers.

I don't want to ruin the good pattern that I have worked so hard to put in place - a good sleeper (for the most part) - but I don't want her to have to bring a paci with her to sleep at college (okay, so I realize that's a big far fetched).

Ideas?

Naming the boy!

You knew I'd write about it sometime. Right? We have to name this little boy. Of course, Andrew and I have always been very tight-lipped about the final name chosen for our kids. I think several people guessed Abigail but as far as I know, nobody guessed Elsie's name! :)

However, we like to hear opinions during the process (just not on the final name) so . . .

I'm releasing our current name list!

Now, don't freak out too much when you see some of these. Some of them are names that I LOVE but Andrew has vetoed and vise versa. So, some are not really in consideration but 1/2 of this parenting team! :) Also, some of them are just funny to us so we put them on the list!

In no particular order:

Emmett Schechter
Eli Schechter
Matthias Schechter
Noah Schechter
Aaron Schechter
Levi Schechter
Eli Schechter
Titus Schechter
Henry Schechter
Judah Schechter
Tobias Schechter
Adam Schechter
Anders Schechter (Means Son of Andrew - ha ha ha ha!!)
Barrett Schechter
Cedric Schechter
David Schechter
Elias Schechter

Feel free to post your votes/thoughts in my comments section! :)

Abigail "isms"

She says funny stuff all the time. I'm afraid that if I don't write these down, I will forget!

Some of these are less funny and more just insightful.

• Today while driving around in the car she said, "Green means go, Red means stop, and Yellow means careful". I knew that she knew what the red and green meant at a stop light but I was shocked when she said the part about yellow.
• She stayed the night with her grandparents two nights ago and got them up several times for different "needs" during the night. When I asked her why, she explained that she had to go the bathroom (a ploy to get out of bed) and that her antics "made Papa very tired".
• A few weeks ago, I was sitting in Andrew's office while he worked and we chatted. Abigail was playing in the basement and lost her ball behind a few pieces of lumber. Andrew got the ball for her (which I guess I didn't see) and when I asked her if she had found her ball she said (in a very - "duh, mom"-like voice), "Yeah, Daddy's strong. He can get the ball for me." Ha!
• She has been playing more and more with her baby dolls these days. Lately she'll make one of the baby dolls come up and "hit" me and then she'll take the doll to have a "talk" and a 3-minute "time out". This is particularly funny to me because in all of the incidents in our house where Abigail has been in trouble, I cannot ever remember a time when she has hit someone or been in trouble for hitting!

Days like this

Have I used that title before?

Hmm . . .

I know I have talked about failure before so I'll skip the details.

Let's just say that the awful word . . . "failure" lurks at me around every corner - especially every mothering corner.

However, I am encouraged today knowing that it is in my failure and weakness that Christ can show His greatness. I don't have to be perfect (house, kids, looks, etc) to make a difference. I certainly need reminded of this today!

Phil 4:13 - I can do all things through him who strengthens me.

I am taking that verse to heart even though my efforts, next to those of others, (ugh! comparisons don't do anyone any good) look pitiful and dull.

Yesterday

So yesterday I managed to make a successful batch of "Grandma Bread" even though I ran out of flour. You see, she uses only bread flour. I started with that but only had 3 cups, so I switched to just white flour - which I ran out of, so I switched to whole-wheat pastry flour. I figured that it would be dense but it wasn't too bad - much better than my other attempts. I think the key was finding out from her the exact rising times because I can never tell when "double" is on a rising dough and that seems to have made a huge difference.

I also completed the banana bread - of which I think we've almost consumed a whole loaf already.

I also managed to complete the lasagna before 4 pm. I felt bad because a few points during that process I had a crying, fussy 15-month old sitting at my feet and grabbing my legs. I ignored her for a while, finished my task and then attended to her.

She's better (no fever and no runny nose) but man-oh-man she's been C.R.A.N.K.Y lately. My suspicion is that she has two front teeth and a molar also coming in. I gave her Tylenol finally today after hours of fussing and she perked up within about 15 minute. I don't like to medicate but even I have limits!

We were also able to celebrate Valentine's Day together after my generous mother-in-law offered to keep the kids so we could go out together. Andrew and I couldn't remember exactly the last meal we had eaten alone together but we think it was for his birthday - could have been November, though. We also saw "The King's Speech" which was an excellent movie. I think the last movie I had been to was last summer but I can't say for sure on that either!

Let me tell you, it just felt like pure luxury! I had the most delicious Crab-Stuffed Sole with Sauteed Veggies and Rice Pilaf for dinner - someone else made it and someone else cleaned it up and it was divine!! I also could just sit and eat without feeding anyone else or cutting anyone else's food! Woo!

When we got home I finished the marinade for the chicken, which I will finish up here in an hour or two.

I didn't get to the last thing on my list! Actually, shock-of-all-shocks . . . my husband reads my blog. I mean, I knew he read my blog . . . like as in once-a-month reading or something like that but when I talked to him yesterday he questioned me about the "surprise". Oops! Well, I didn't get it done.

He leaves tomorrow for his 5 1/2 day business trip! Wish me luck! I know I'll be fine with the girls. I'm trying to think of close attrations we can go to during the day to get out a little but it is hard to do in the winter and for free. :) I am looking forward to having my bed to myself for a whole week. Andrew is not a good sleeper and lately the tossing and turning has been keeping me awake too.

What I'm doing today . . .

Cooking! It wasn't really in the plan to make so much today but Elsie seems to finally be on the mend so I my hands and lap will be a bit more free today.

1) Making Grandma bread (Andrew's grandma) - if you live in this area you know how good this is! My last few attempts have been semi-flops but I found out from her that she only uses bread flour. I don't have quite enough bread flour for the whole recipe but I'm hoping that 1/2 will at least make it lighter. Oh, the main reason that I'm making this? . . . is that we're out of bread. I know I could just run to the store but I'm trying to do things cheaply.

2) Making Banana bread - I had some old bananas and I'm taking food to a couple in our church tomorrow who just had a baby, so they will get a loaf.

These two are already started at this point so they will definitely be done today. The following three could be derailed by children, my tired self, or any other number of things.

3) Making Lasagna - I'm trying to double several recipes and freeze half for when the baby comes. I know I'll have plenty of time and people who will bring be food but long after the food stops coming, I will still have 3 very young children and I know it will be nice to have some healthy homemade meals I can pull from the freezer and put into the oven. I already have a chicken pot pie made so lasagna is next on the list.

Anybody have any more good freezer meals? I have several others on my list but I'm going to try to make one a week for a while.

4) Start making Baked Chicken Breast Surpreme - this is what I'm making for the couple in our church tomorrow. It has to marinade overnight so I need to start it today.

5) Making A Suprise: I'm also trying to fit in the time to bake a special treat for my beloved husband - since it is valentine's weekend. He leaves on Sunday for 5 1/2 days in Boston so we won't probably get to celebrate valentine's day this year - not that we do much anyway. I can't remember the last time we had a meal alone together, November maybe. My memory fails me. Oh well, our time will come! :)

Whew! I'm going to go lay down while my bread is baking and the other bread is rising.

Happy Friday!

15-months old

Dear Elsie,

You are 15-months old and as fun as you can be!

Isn't that the cutest picture??!!

You are joy to be around with a very sweet personality. You started walking, I mean really walking (more than two steps) a two weeks ago and you have been on the move ever since. Now I rarely see you crawl. Sniff sniff! You are growing up so fast!

You love to be entertained by your sister, as long as she doesn't get too close, too loud, for very long. You are easily entertained by yourself, playing with a random plastic or wooden toy. It just makes it better if you can bang two things together. You LOVE to eat, I really mean EAT! Several nights at dinner I noticed that you had eaten the same serving size as me and your sister. Wow! You love to feed yourself and to make a mess with your food - which is a relatively new concept in this house but fun none-the-less.

Your doctor check up was yesterday and we found out that your head is still 95% (don't remember the measurement), you are 30 inches long - which puts you at about 50% for length, and only 18.5 pounds - which has caused you to drop off the chart for weight.

The doctor said that he is not concerned, however, because of how beautiful you look. You still have quite a bit of baby chub on your legs, belly and chin and you love to eat. I am going to try to help you gain a bit by increasing your milk to twice a day and be sure to let you eat until you're full. I try to do this already but it's hard to know with a 15-month old.

And today, my love, you are sick! This is only the 2nd time in your life you've ever run a fever and you just don't know what to do - except sleep! It was 101 when you woke up, 104 after your morning nap, and 102 after lunch and Tylenol. I'm trying to make you more comfortable by giving you some Motrin as well. I hope it works, poor sick baby! You don't seem to have the sniffles or an upset tummy and you even played for a bit downstairs.

I love you my darling, second-born daughter. Your sweet personality and joy greet me each morning and I am so thankful to be your mommy!

Feel better soon!

Love,

Mama

Work

Oh my friends, can I be real and honest with you for a bit? That is what our sermon was about this morning and while I certainly don't share everything on my blog, what I do write about is true and authentic.

Right now I'm struggling with something. . . for the first time since we got married, I will not be bringing in one dime of income for our family.

Wow. I didn't know giving this up would be so hard.

The first year of our marriage, I was still in school so Andrew worked to support us, yet, I still worked a part-time job. Then I was out of work for two weeks when we moved here, and I did quit my full-time job in November '09 to be at home with the kids yet since that time I've always found it possible to help out financially in some way - whether it was insurance money, voice lesson income, or a small part-time job.

I can't really figure out why this is so hard for me. My husband wants me to do it and I realize that as a mom with three very young kids, my priority needs to be at home right now.

These are just the possible reasons for feeling so challenged by this:

• In my generation, there is not much value placed on women who stay at home with their kids.
• I feel like I will have nothing of my own if I don't actually make an income.
• I will be totally dependent on another human for my needs (I know I have done this before but it's just different as an adult).
• I won't have an excuse to "get away" once a week or so to work.
• I feel a much bigger sense of accomplishment from completing a task for work than I do from cleaning out the dishwasher, laundry, or changing a diaper.
• I am an incredibly short-sighted person so while I know there will be many years for me to help contribute financially to the family, it's hard for me to see when these years of little ones with big needs will end.
• I manage the budget and know the household expenses. My husband is a very capable provider and I know he can make the extra we need to cover everything but I also want to be a help and to not place that extra burden on him.

I'm quitting to focus on my family and because I cannot put in the hours that my employer has requested. I know that is not fair to them.

Tuesday may be my last day at work. I'm not sure yet. On the bright side, I am looking forward to having my free time - a.k.a. nap time - available to do other things, like blog or clean or even relax (what a concept).

Anyway, I'd love to hear from you!

Healthier Chocolate Chip Cookies

It's really funny that I would follow up my last post with this one. Chocolate Chip Cookies are my favorite - especially if they are under-baked and gooey. Yum!

In my quest to eat a little better I have searched for an alternative chocolate chip cookie that wouldn't contain shortening, could be made with whole wheat, and less sugar or a sugar alternative.

I couldn't really find one that was good, honestly. The few I tried fell flat, literally. The cookies were runny, or flat or crispy.

So . . . I took my old favorite basic chocolate chip cookie recipe and simply modified it by changing the ingredients.

The verdit . . . . YUMMY!! The only problem with these cookies is that my mind thinks they are "healthier" so I tend to eat too many. Now keep in mind that they are still cookies. I wouldn't eat them for breakfast or label them as a health food but as far as a cookie goes, they are better than store-bought or your "regular" chocolate chip cookie.

Here's the recipe:

Jaime’s Healthier Chocolate Chip Cookies

Ingredients:
1 stick real butter, softened (preferrably from grass-fed antibiotic and hormone-free cows)
3/4 cup Sucanat
1/2 cup pure cane sugar (can also use raw turbinado sugar)
1 fresh free-range egg
1 tsp pure vanilla extract (scant)
1 cup whole wheat pastry flour
3/4 cup unbleached white flour (sometimes I use all whole wheat pastry)
1 tsp aluminum free baking soda
1 tsp unrefined sea salt
1 cup chocolate chips (can find grain-sweetened chocolate chips)

Instructions:Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Cream butter and sugars. Add egg and vanilla and beat until foamy. Add flours, salt and baking soda. Stir just until mixed. Fold in chocolate chips. Drop in rounded balls onto a cookie sheet.

Bake for 7-8 minutes (or perhaps slightly less). Remove from oven before they are fully done in the middle for a cookie that stays soft and chewy the next day.


If you make these, let me know what you think!!

Show Us Your Life - What do you feed your kids?

Show us your life is hosted by Kelly over at Kelly's Korner Blog. I have never participated before but since this is a subject near and dear to my heart - feeding my children healthy foods, I am going to share a bit.

I have always had a very strong conviction that kids need to be fed healthy and whole foods from the very start of life. To me this means breastfeeding . . . no matter what the cost.

I'm not going to turn this into a breastfeeding discussion and I know that there are honestly some people that cannot breastfeed due to medical concerns but those are few and far between. It wasn't easy for me either but it was a commitment that I made to myself and to my kids when they were born.

When my kids started "solid" food, I started to do my research. I learned that white rice cereal is probably not the best choice for a first food. First of all, it just contains simple carbs which the body will just turn to sugar. Also, if you are breastfeeding, you are taking a perfect and fatty food (which children desperately need for brain development) and substituting it for a food with no fat and very little nutritional value.

So I actually started my kids on bananas. We soon progressed to other mushy and fatty things like avocado and quickly added in fruits and veggies.

My oldest cutie pie, Abigail, learning how to eat!

I honestly think one of the main keys to success when getting a child to eat healthy foods is a very simple one . . . start as you mean to go on. I have consistently offered my kids a fruit and a vegetable at almost every meal, whole grains, and healthy meats. They don't know what white bread or white rice is so they don't ask for it.

Sweet Elsie!

Now . . . does this mean I feed my kids perfectly? Definitely not! Not only do I have a husband to contend with (sorry dear!) who tends to lean towards cheaper and not quite as whole foods as I prefer, and we are trying to do all of this on a budget. I also find it difficult to cook in early pregnancy and so I'm sure my kids ate their fair share of junk during that time (I don't really remember!)

My main line of defence when it comes to this is . . . cooking from scratch. My kids eat macaroni and cheese, spaghetti, and pizza but you won't find me opening a can or calling a store to get these items. I usually make it all from scratch. That way I know what goes into each food, I can substitute whole grains (like pasta) for the white ones and add or take out things that are "unhealthy".




Here are some of my favorite meals that are simple and easy to cook for kids:

Breakfast:

• Eggs and Toast - both my kiddos love scrambled eggs and buttered whole wheat toast for breakfast. Had it this morning - actually.
• Fruit - We usually have bananas, pineapple, pears, grapes, or peaches.
• Whole Wheat Pancakes or Waffles - I make these from scratch one morning a week, usually and we'll munch on them for the rest of the week. Use real maple syrup or honey instead of syrup containing HFCS.
• French Toast - yum. My husband usually makes this on the weekend - again usually with whole wheat bread.
• Smoothies - I don't get around to making these very often and the reason is because I don't often have a wide variety of fruit available. I always have fruit but it's usually just one or two options at a time. I want to start doing more of this, though.

*My kids don't eat much cereal. When they are babies I usually give them whole grain organic "o"'s to practice eating finger foods but beyond that we don't generally eat cereal in our house. My youngest daughter drinks a low-pasteurized, non-homogenized, grass-fed antibiotic and hormone-free milk once a day but my oldest daughter has never had milk - and now doesn't want it!

Lunches:

• Almond butter sandwiches! Lots of good protein and I do put a little jam on there for a sweet taste. You must read the labels or make your own on this to make sure it doesn't contain HFCS.
• Egg Sandwiches. A family favorite! I usually add a slice of natural cheese (not processed!) to boost fat content for the kiddos and calories.
• Peas, Broccoli, Cauliflower, Green Beans, Carrots - these are our favorite veggies and we need to branch out a bit but both of my girls eat these really well.
• Macaroni and Cheese - yes I do this for lunch sometimes but I either make it from scratch with my own cheese sauce and whole wheat pasta or I use an Annie's Organic Box.
• We do occasionally have grilled cheese but again I only use cheddar or a similar cheese - not American.

Dinner

There are so many things I could put here but I will just write down some of our favorites.

• Meatloaf and veggies. I have a great recipe from Passionate Homemaking for Meatloaf. You make your own bread crumbs (the ones from the store can contain nasty stuff), and your own ketchup mixture for the top (again . . . regular ketchup is full of sugar and usually HFCS).
• Homemade Pizza. I buy nitrate free pepperoni and my pizza sauce from Whole Foods and I usually make the dough from scratch.
• Spaghetti. Again, I use a whole wheat pasta, organic jarred sauce and grass fed beef.
• Carol's Mexican Chicken. Yummy and easy mexican dish. Chicken breast in a crock pot with whole kernel corn and black beans. Mix in taco seasoning (again making your own - the store stuff has additives) and sour cream at the end. Yummy!

I'm sure there's more but that's all my ideas for now.

*Note on picky eaters: Perhaps I have been blessed by kids that are just simply not picky but my girls generally eat great. I think that a lot of it has to do with our expectations. I always try to cook foods that they are able to eat but not necessarily their favorites. For example, I refrain from making steak sometimes because it is hard for little girls to eat that. However we just expect them to eat what is cooked. My 3-year old does have preferences and after she has tried something she will say she doesn't like it. That's fine with me. I will simply put it away but if she gets hungry later, that is what is getting pulled out of the fridge.*

Again, in no way do I feed my kids perfect food. I strive to do my best and then I forgive the times when I might feed them something a little questionable (so long as it doesn't become a habit). I'm sure there are many things I could put more effort into and many other foods I could introduce them to at this point.

Happy Birthday, Abigail

Happy Birthday to my wonderful, silly, darling, facinating, dramatic and lovely daughter, Abigail!

What a wonderful and crazy 3 years it has been, darling. I'm looking forward to all the rest!!

8 days old.

Talking with Grandma RoRo a few weeks ago.

Trying on Mama's glasses - silly girl!